Two years ago, I entered a 12 hour mountain bike race. The course was a 9 mile loop with the goal of completing as many laps as possible within 12 hours. The year before, I had taken 3rd in my class. I was stronger for this race, and hoped to at least equal my previous performance.
As usual, I started the race slowly, but that is of little concern over 12 hours. The day was sunny and reasonably warm, and I felt good. My first mishap occurred on the third lap, when I broke a chain. Since I carried a chain tool and extra links, I only lost a little time. It was early, and ten minutes might not matter much over the course of the race.
The second incident occurred on the fifth lap, and was much more serious. Things happened fast. I remember the beginning and the end, but not the in between. I was on a narrow portion of the trail, where the right side was a rock wall and the left a drop-off of about a dozen feet. I believe that I bumped the rock wall in such a way that I veered left and over the cliff. I recall reaching for a bush on the way down, and I think that made a difference.
My bike was on top of me and my right shoulder hurt like hell. I had landed hard on the way down and received a nasty bruise. But I was in one piece and all I could think about was getting back to the trail and continuing the race.
I worked my up a shallow incline and reached the trail a short distance before the point where I had fallen. Now I realized how badly my shoulder was bruised. I could barely raise my right hand above my waist, and this was going to be a problem. In off-road riding, pulling up on the handlebars and moving the front end of the bike are critical. It would be tough getting over and around obstacles.
I still had seven hours of racing and the last three would be in the dark, with only my headlight to show the way. At this point, thoughts of a podium finish were gone. I was just hoping for survival.
The first time through the start/finish after the fall, I passed one of my riding buddies who was helping with the race. I recall saying, “I fell of a f**king cliff!” My shoulder ached with a pain I could only try to ignore. I focused hard, because each hill or obstacle had to be cleared perfectly. Down one arm there was little room for error.
I rode seven more laps, each time passing the place where I had gone off the trail. I even had a couple laps faster than my uninjured pace from the early part of the race. But the exhaustion was more mental than physical. By the last lap my focus was disintegrating and I wandered off the trail a few times. There was just a beam of light cutting through the gathering mist and the thin line of trail ahead, both surrounded by darkness. More than once I forgot which part of the trail I was on. The last lap was so much slower that people were starting to organize a search for me.
I somehow completed two more laps than the previous year and earned a 5th place finish in my class. Maybe I would have reached the podium if I had not gone over a cliff or broken a chain. While it’s fun to think about what might have been, I can’t worry about those things. Every race holds good and bad fortune for many riders. Maybe the year I took 3rd some other rider had a problem that kept him behind me.
How does this story relate to RPGs? I could have abandoned the race after falling off the cliff. No one would have questioned that decision. I had proven myself in enough rides and races that no one would consider me a quitter. It probably would have been wise to quit. I risked greater injury by continuing.
The story relates to RPGs because it describes an outlook for life. At White Haired Man, we’ve been plugging away for over four years. We have had some modest success, but not nearly enough to keep us going if all we sought was money or recognition. There’s something else that pushes us to create our adventures. That something lies within us, and compels us to pursue our dream.
I can’t explain it any better than that. Either you have the desire within you, or you do not. It is not something that gets turned on or off, it is part of who you are and shows itself in everything that you do.
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